Lovelorn
by BookSerpentess
Summary: He still loved her, never mind she had chosen her Clan over him. He did not regret it. Although his heart was doomed forever for this pain, which tore him apart every day, no, he did not. One-shot.


**A/N: Hey, guys. For those of you who read my fanfic Betrayal, I am **_**so**_** sorry for being late with it! Stress is pounding on my head, my tests are coming up, and to make matters worse, writer's blocks are attacking me. Argh. I'm SO sorry. **** I mean it. So… this is sort of an apology to my Betrayal readers, especially those who like Leafpool and Crowfeather. ;) I totally love that couple **_**so much**_**! 3 I know this is short, but it's all I can spare right now… Sorry. :/ Oh, and yes, if anyone noticed I did just change my name. ^^**

**Anyways, enjoy! :D**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Warriors world and its characters. **

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"Crowfeather! Are you even listening to me?"

The tom in question growled under his breath and turned his weary gaze to his frustrated mate. "No, I wasn't. What were you saying?"

Nightcloud huffed. "I _said_, did you notice the way you've been treating Breezepaw? He's an apprentice now, for StarClan's sake! You are a father – act like it! How many times do we have to hold this conversation, Crowfeather? Or is your heart still fixed with _Leafpool_?" Her lips curled, spitting out the name of the ThunderClan medicine cat like it was a particularly disgusting bit of crowfood stuck between her teeth.

Crowfeather's pelt prickled, both in annoyance and her tone. _Can't she just leave me alone? _ "Of course, Nightcloud," he responded smoothly. "He is my son, no matter how irritating he is. And, as for Leafpool, you don't have to worry – there's no need for petty _jealousy_, yes? My life with her is over." Bile rose in his throat at the lie he'd made so many times, but he pushed it down.

She didn't even seem to notice his deception. "Good." She opened her mouth to say something, but her mate cut her off.

"I'm going hunting. _Alone_. There is no need to join me."

He turned and started walking away quickly before he could see the hurt in the black she-cat's eyes. He didn't mean to hurt her; but he didn't love her. He did care, yes; but not as much as he had loved Feathertail, and certainly not as much as he had loved Leafpool. She would have to deal with the painful truth.

Crowfeather knew he was being cruel, but, how else was he supposed to get the message across that he didn't actually _love_ Nightcloud, in the way she did? His heart now lay with the ThunderClan medicine cat – as much as he hated it.

He noticed that he'd arrived at their – himself and Leafpool's – secret meeting spot. His gaze lingered on the spot they'd once shared tongues on, and his heart aching a little. Glancing around quickly to make sure no one saw him, he lay down on a grassy, shaded spot and laid his head on his paws.

_Leafpool gazed up at him, her amber eyes brimming with laughter, as he bowled her over gently and pinned her down, leaning over her with a smile. _

"_Okay, you caught me. You can let me up." She gave him a sweet smile which made his heart beat faster. He stepped away and they curled up together, staring up at the sky. _

_It was a beautiful night, with glittering stars that seemed to promise eternal joy. But Crowfeather knew it was just an illusion. He knew… He knew their relationship, their happiness, would not last, unless he and Leafpool ran away. _

_Voicing his thoughts, the cat he loved spoke. "I wish we could just stay here... Forever." There was a wistful sigh in her voice. _

_He turned his blue gaze to her. "You know we won't be able to do that… until we…" He let the sentence trail away, knowing she would know what he was implying. He'd done it many a time. _

_Leafpool stiffened a little, then looked up to meet his gaze. "I…"_

"_Have you considered it?" he pushed. _

"_Yes," she admitted. "But… I don't know, Crowfeather. What about my Clan? What about Firestar – Squirrelflight –Cinderpelt?" Her eyes were deep pools of anguish._

"_They'll be fine," he persisted. "I mean, they'll grieve their loss, like my Clan will grieve theirs, but they'll move on." _

_She sighed. "You're right, it's just… so hard." _

_He pushed his nose comfortingly in her fur. "I know. But it's the only way we'll be able to be together. Someone will find out about us eventually, and we won't be able to meet in secret anymore." His heart twisted. "Just… think about it some more, okay?" _

"_Okay." _

_He entwined his tail with hers, savoring their peace while it lasted. This, indeed, was the meaning of peace. But not of freedom. Freedom would be everlasting happiness, both of them, he and Leafpool, running off into the sunset together, their hearts forever in love. He wanted that so much. He never had that with Feathertail, and now that he found another cat he loved perhaps even more, he wanted to keep her. _

_Crowfeather would never force Leafpool to leave, but he hoped, with all his heart, that she would say yes. He knew he could never find happiness again after this. He simply loved her… too much. _

Crowfeather sighed. _Too much indeed_.

He still loved her, never mind she had chosen her Clan over him. He did not regret it. Although his heart was doomed forever for this pain, which tore him apart every day, no, he did not.


End file.
